Religion for atheists

By Rome

Wednesday 19 August 2026

The words below describe the personal consequences of a violently rough episode which recently occurred in my life and have caused me to seek an answer.  It did not occur in Ukraine, or in anything connected with Ukraine.  However, it addresses a way to understand and face horror.  It also explains why you exist.

I have never been religious, or even spiritual.  I used to say, “I don’t believe in God.  I believe in Man.”  This was my mantra from teenage years forward.  I faced difficulties mostly by exploring my own psychology.

Fundamentally, the notion of a superior being, in addition to requiring a faith I did not possess, conflicted with my notions and desire for individual liberty.  There is a lot to unpack and even question there, but that was how I was, and still am.

When my wife died of cancer just after her 39^th birthday, leaving me with three young beanies and a newborn, I never looked to God, or to the gods. Whatever.  The youth, energy and beauty of my young brood lifted me like a rising tide over the beckoning shoals of depression.

My wife’s best friend from uni years, a practicing Christian with a minister in her family, told me that she had offered her children religion so they could have a resource to help them should they have such an experience.  I understood.  But faith in God did not work for me.

As the years have passed, and my experiences accrued, I had to modify my mantra of yore.  I deleted the second sentence.  It became, “I don’t believe in God.”

Friend, my view of humanity had sunk further.  I will not detail the reasons why.  You know them.  Can people be beautiful?  Yes.  Can they be good?  Yes.   Can I be moved to tears by their generosity, courage, and capacity to love?  Yes.  However, I concluded some years ago that, objectively, the greatest tragedy in the history of the Earth was the appearance of homo sapiens.  Mankind is bad for itself and for all living things.  I would be very excited if we can send people to Mars – omg – but that would be bad news for Mars.  People are often proud to be of their nationality, or of some other group to which they belong.  I am not proud to be a human being, so I don’t get that far.

While the preceding perspective is on the macro scale to the max, I have the same view at the opposite end of granularity.  On a person-by-person level, even the happiest among us, and I have reason to be one of those, suffers.  Inevitably.  Again, you do not need an explanation. Mankind is just not a very successful species when you take this into account.  Scientific and cultural achievements do not erase these facts.

I am not one to wallow in sadness or self-pity.  Quite the opposite.  I am engaged.  I founded the first online chat group in France for young widows and widowers.  I was elected to public office.  I drove Ukrainian refugees from the Polish border in 2022, and I volunteer in Ukraine for a month every year.  I distribute educational materials for free in dozens of countries.  I help friends pay for rent, for food, for medical care and education.

But something unexpected and horrible happened.  Now I need religion.  I need something to explain everything.  The answer to any question why.  I need the truth.

I have found it.  It is not God. It is likelihood.

What happened to trigger this search?  One of my closest friends, a Colombian, the only guy I have ever called Bro, was kidnapped.  They tortured him, and sent me pictures.  He has not been released.  There has been no news since the ransom deadline expired.  He may be dead.  This happened in Medellin.  If it is a scam, I would be delighted.  But there are reasons which make me believe it is real.

So, what is this religion I call likelihood?  There are only two steps to your conversion.  Both are easy.

First, you must accept that people are capable of horrific things.  I doubt this is a problem for you.

Second, on a purely rational basis, which even the most spiritual person would be hard pressed to deny, the longer you live, the more experiences you have, and especially if you stay broadly open to people and circumstances, the greater the likelihood that you will come into contact with horror.

So, don’t be shocked if it happens to you.

If you accept the religion of likelihood, there is no more surprise.  There is pain, but now you know why.  If there is a war, if there is a cruel dictator, if there is injustice  –  all this can be explained.  In the billions upon billions of random occurrences daily, multiplied by 365 days a year, times your perpetually growing life span, likelihood increases the chances that you or someone you know will encounter horror.

Obviously, I do not excuse horrible people.  My heart goes out to you for the pain they have caused.  Personally, to you.

I cannot rid my mind of the images of Bro being tortured.  However, the religion of likelihood tells me that, at some point, something like this could happen in my life.  It did.

Point Nemo is the most remote place on Earth.  I actually spend most of the year near there. The population density in a 5,000 km radius circle around me (which represents about one sixth of the earth’s surface, or five times the size of Russia) is less than 0.1 persons per square kilometer.  I like it that way.

But even here, likelihood catches up with me.

Likelihood does not work against you.  It even has a flip side:  The more you live, the more experiences you have, the more likelihood will grant you wonders beyond your imagination.  That happens to me, too.  Almost daily.

So there you have it.  Likelihood.  It explains everything.  If something is possible, likelihood may cause it to happen.  Do not be shocked.  You can call it probability, if you wish, or randomness, but they are not the same.  You can look it up.  Also, likelihood does not mean likely, and it does not mean fate.

I do not suggest that likelihood is a reason to be apathetic.  Perhaps this subject should be given further thought, but our compassion, beliefs, sympathy and empathy, and fears and dreams, are all good reasons, or in any event reasons, to act.  Just do not act because of hate, or be really careful.  Of course, likelihood dictates that some of you will not abide by this ancient advice.

To conclude:  We are all in pain from the war in Ukraine, from the violence in the Middle East, from unspoken miseries.  Maybe you have experienced a specific event, or loss, from somewhere or someone else in your life.  Likelihood asserts that you most probably have pain.

And here is the reason you exist:  likelihood.  You are unique, exceptional, and in some ways – though not necessarily in every way – completely unexpected.  But you happened.

Lots of love, anyway.